My Girlfriend is Pregnant, Now What?

My Girlfriend is Pregnant, Now What?

She’s pregnant. You probably didn’t see this coming, and it’s okay if you’re unsure what to think right now. In moments like this, it can feel like you’ve lost control—but you still have real influence.

How you respond in the next few days will say a lot about your character. Staying calm, listening, and showing support can make a world of difference for both of you.

That’s why it’s so important to take a breath, keep a level head, and respond instead of reacting. This blog will help you understand what she may be feeling, what your next steps could be, and how to move forward together.

 

Is My Girlfriend Pregnant?

Before making any assumptions, it’s important to confirm whether your girlfriend is actually pregnant. If you haven’t already, start with a pregnancy test.

If she needs one, The Pregnancy Center of Dillon County offers lab-quality pregnancy tests at no cost.

If her test comes back positive, the next step is an ultrasound to confirm that the pregnancy is viable and determine how far along she is.

Why does that matter? A positive test only detects the hormone that appears during pregnancy. It doesn’t show whether the pregnancy is developing normally or still continuing.

The Pregnancy Center of Dillon County also provides free limited ultrasounds, and you’re welcome to attend the appointment with her for support.

 

What Not to Do When Your Girlfriend Is Pregnant

In a situation like this, it’s easy to feel powerless. Before thinking about what you should do, it’s worth understanding what not to do.

Don’t Walk Away

When stress spikes, the body’s natural response is to fight or flee. You might feel the urge to escape—but try not to. She’s facing an even greater emotional load right now and needs to know she’s not alone.

Simply showing up and staying present, even in the awkward silence, can mean more than you realize.

Don’t Fight

Tension is high for both of you. You might feel frustrated, anxious, or scared. She might too. But arguing won’t help either of you.

Instead, listen. Let her talk. Affirm her feelings without trying to solve everything right away. You don’t have to have all the answers. You just have to be steady.

Your calm presence offers stability when everything else feels uncertain.

 

What Options Are There?

When it comes to pregnancy, the choice ultimately belongs to her. Generally, she has three options:

  • Carry the pregnancy and parent

  • Carry the pregnancy and make an adoption plan

  • End the pregnancy through abortion

Statistically, unmarried women with unplanned pregnancies choose to carry about 60% of the time and abort around 40% of the time.¹

Remember, abortion is a serious medical and emotional decision. Women who feel pressured into abortion by a partner are at a higher risk for emotional trauma and mental health struggles afterward, including PTSD.²

Never pressure her toward any decision—especially abortion. What she needs most is space to process, and a partner who listens and supports her.

It’s her body and her decision, but she doesn’t have to make it alone. You both deserve a chance to talk through what this means for your future, your relationship, and your values.

 

“I’m Not Ready to Be a Dad.”

You might not be against the idea of becoming a dad someday—you just didn’t expect “someday” to arrive this soon. That feeling is normal.

The truth is, no one ever feels completely ready. Fatherhood tends to bring out a deeper strength and purpose. It’s less about perfection and more about presence—showing up, learning as you go, and growing into the role.

Being a great dad isn’t about having it all figured out. It’s about being available, teachable, and willing to care.

Try not to let fears about money, time, or lost freedom make the decision for you. Support and resources exist to help you both succeed. And once your child is born, most men find those early fears fade quickly.

Many men regret walking away from fatherhood. Few regret stepping up to it.

 

Support in Bemidji, MN

You don’t have to figure this out alone. Northwoods Pregnancy Center offers free, confidential support for both you and your partner, including baby supplies and material assistance


Every service is free and designed to help you take your next steps with confidence.

 

 

 

Sources

 

  1. 1. https://www.guttmacher.org/fact-sheet/unintended-pregnancy-and-abortion-northern-america
    2. https://journals.sagepub.com/doi/pdf/10.1177/08862605241253026